What does independence mean to me? The answer is very simple: live a life by my own. In my country, children used to be taken good care by their parents. Even after eighteen years old, parents still cover everything for their children which make these kids not so mature.
From my personal experience, I have been taken care by my mon for over twenty years. She covers all my living expenses what I need to do is to follow her every word. She make the plan for my life. She decided which university I should go, she decided friends I hang out with. You know, sometimes you will be driven crazy by the rules she made for you. But considering you are not economically independent, you should accept all these things without complain. From this point of view, independence of a person means you have to make a living by yourself. In addition, in a country like China, if you want to handle everything by your own, to a person who just get graduated from university is impossible. For instance, when you are sick you need to see the doctor and the first minute you arrive the hospital you'll see a endless line in fron of the counter. This is the first step, there are still lines for test and pharmacy. If you have someone who work in the hospital things will be easier. All you need to do is to call your friends to ask for a short path.
I understand what you mean when you need to depend on someone else's in order to make things easier because this also happens in my country. Connection is really important in order to get things done easily. Sometimes having the right skills but not the right connection does not get the person very far in his/her career. However, in my opinion, in a country like USA, having the right skill is all it takes.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how much you can learn from another person with a total different background, and I totally love it. For me Chinese culture is very intriguing but at the same time very unknown.
ReplyDeleteThat is why I thank you for sharing with us your point of view.
What concern to independence, I guess you can always have choices to take even though some one takes so many for you, and that makes you free. In the other hand I think the links you can make with your family of being that close can be much stronger than having your so called “indecency”
Thank you for sharing your cultural background with us. Learning about different perspectives from people in other countries is one of the most interesting things in this class. Reading your post, I could see how important relationships and connections are in your culture. Chinese culture is collectivism, while American culture is individualism. I think this cultural difference greatly influences what independence means to people. I completely agree with your idea that people still should depend on others sometimes even after they become independent financially.
ReplyDeleteDear Shanshan,
ReplyDeleteI find what you wrote really interesting, because I just a read in a textbook for another class about how China is such a collectivistic culture where, even for small things, family/friends help each other out. Prior to reading this, I most likely wouldn't have understood your example of standing in a long line in a hospital and why it would be difficult for you to resist calling upon a friend to help you out. In America, it is easier to grow up to be independent because independence is valued from the start, whereas in collectivistic societies (such as many Asian cultures), this is extremely difficult because everyone is focused on helping each other out for the benefit of the group. Doing things individually and for oneself is frowned upon. In the end, what seems to be simple is, in actuality, a complex and nuanced issue from any angle.
Thanks for your post. I look forward to reading more from you.
Sincerely,
Mitali